Can I Lose Myself?

I see their lifestyles and their values if any. I wonder. I know sometimes these people may pretend to like me just to get me in their web like a spider in a cobweb. I see beyond that. Sometimes I see the ugly stares or even rudeness.

I know that maybe I should compromise. However I decide not to and just to be myself. I like myself and I know that there are others who do too. I don’t want to lose myself or the other people in my life. I try to change and please other people but I come back to myself. I can’t seem to lose myself. I come to the conclusion that I’m not a people pleaser. I once was. I guess I’ve stepped out of the box.

Have I given up too much stepping out of the box? I guess there are some things I have given up and may miss but I’ve found so many other things that I like and value. There are compromises in these things too.
I say I won’t compromise but I do. I compromise when I see that I am wrong or hurting others or myself.
Yes I may compromise but I can’t lose myself.

You see. I have a selfish reason. I don’t want to be in another person’s hell.

6 thoughts on “Can I Lose Myself?

  1. Shakti Ghosal

    Interesting post. So as you contemplate, what would you say could be the reason for these other people to get you in their web? And what would you say is at the core of this animosity which you see being displayed towards you? Would you say this is about you or the displayer? Care to reflect with me?


    1. shalilah2002 Post author

      It’s not about me. These other people I’m talking about are people who want everybody to follow them in whatever they do. That’s what I mean when I say get into their web. The thing is some people like me don’t choose to follow or be with them. Say they’re the going click and you don’t think they’re all that. I’d rather be true to myself than conform to their standard of dress, their way of talking. (they may use vulgar language) whatever. The thing is be true to yourself and please yourself.

      1. Shakti Ghosal

        I like what you say of being true to oneself. But what do you suppose is at the core of this need of these people to have others follow them? Is this something about them or the followers?


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